Assumptions

When I first read about the 24hr Ultra Yeti Challenge on Instagram at the end of March, the NYC Marathon was still boldly circled on my 2020 calendar, and my mental well-being was about as far from “ultra” ready as one could imagine.  I absentmindedly clicked like on the “cool post” and kept scrolling, but something made me comeback the next day and turn my like into a save.  

As days turned into weeks, and weeks became months, it became evident that Covid-19, was going to eat up any and all running goals set forth for 2020.  To be clear, in the grand scheme of this devastating pandemic means absolutely nothing; except that for me, running goals are what I employ to keep my anxiety-optimism scale (mostly) balanced.  Having a race to look forward to when my over-thinking-over-analyzing-brain begins to spiral, helps remind me to break things down, as I would in training.  So, on June 24th, when New York Road Runners made the absolute right call, and cancelled the 2020 marathon, I flashed back to the aforementioned saved post.

On June 25th, after having been in quarantine for the better part of 3 months, I wasn’t happy about it, but it had become routine.  I no longer wondered if my kids would survive home-schooling; they had.  I no longer questioned how to get groceries; I went out and got them.  I no longer thought there was a chance I’d be running 26.2 miles in 2020; I wasn’t going to.  But, could I really run 30 miles in one day, 3 month later, was I now ready for that kind challenge? 

Over the course of the next couple days, and after having watched a couple Instagram friends (Yuma & Jacque) ROCK the 24 hour ultra, I started to dangle the idea out to a few friends.  Might anyone be interested in running 5 miles, every 4 hours, for 24 hours WITH me?  A few friends laughed and quickly, but politely declined; but two friends, two friends didn’t say no.  Glimmers of hope swirled in my head, as I began to see this goal take shape.

In my heart, I felt the only date that made sense to go for it was July 28, 2020, the 18-Year Remembrance Day of my brother, Greg. I assumed only naturally, that I would need to harness the power of his spirit, to guide me through what would be one of the hardest running challenges I’d ever faced. I asked my running partner if the date would work for her, and then, I waited.

The next day, Melissa (my yeti-buddy) texted: “Bob, took off work to watch the kids; it’s a go!”

My training plan for this particular challenge was different than any marathon plan I’d ever employed, for a couple reasons, but mainly because I only had a month to work with.  I kept all of my runs “easy” and focused on maintaining 20-24 mile weeks.  In addition, for the entire month of July, I challenged myself to do a 2 minute plank each day, and enjoyed a Peloton workout (stretch, strengthening, yoga) every day as well.  I knew I needed to increase core strength, while being super careful not to overdo it, and risk injury.

July 27th: hydrate, carbs, organize 6 outfits, hydrate, finalize routes, carbs, husband psyched to take care of kids (lol), kids psyched to see how many steps mom gets, hydrate, 274ish texts between myself and Melissa.

July 28th: I’m up before my 3:50am alarm has a chance to startle me, the adrenaline flowing through me has already begun to fill my cup.  As has become customary before a big race, I open my Instagram account to share my story, only today, I don’t start with a selfie, a race bib, or a glimpse of a crowd. Today I load a favorite photograph of my handsome brother, Greg, and silently, ask him to help keep my cup full.  I let the tears drip down the bridge of my nose, and give myself permission to feel.  I simultaneously embrace the ache of missing him and the excitement to “find him” out there on the run.  

Run one was terrific, 4:30am comfortable pace, and hot as hell already; Melissa and I effortlessly ran back and forth in front of my house several times, our route consciously chosen in hopes of avoiding wildlife. We watched the watched the sunrise, and smiled as our 24 hours had officially begun.

Run two (8:30am), was enhanced by the socially distanced guest appearances of two dear friends, Paola and Vicki; their enthusiasm and excitement propelled us, and left us drenched in both sweat and happiness by runs’ end.  When I got home, my husband asked how I was doing, and without skipping a beat, I replied: “Great!” (and meant it!)

12:30pm – run 3 at a blistering 91 degrees and 88% humidity, it was literally the least ideal conditions for a run!  We were prepared however, and again had running reinforcements, when we arrived at Rockefeller State Park, Sharon and Lily were waiting.  We powered through another socially distanced run, relying on our friends to bolster our moods, and happy that they were there to (mostly) take our minds off of the intensity of the sun.  This run was definitely not as easy as the first two, but we embraced necessary walk breaks, and laughed often as Sharon side skipped, and Lily longingly gazed at the hills we continued to refuse to run up.  Perhaps my favorite part of the run however, (don’t laugh) was when it was done!  I’d brought jumbo watermelon slices for us all, and let me tell you, I have never had anything taste so wonderful in my whole life!  Again, when I got home to shower and change, my husband asked how I was doing, and I replied “great” and meant it!

Run four – 4:30pm, a new (and thankfully very shaded) route for both Melissa and myself was suggested by Sharon and Lily during our mid-day run, and we jumped on it; curiosity was definitely on our side.  The route started downhill for half mile, and at the bottom we instantly agreed to run out a bit more than necessary, so that we could WALK up the hill on our return.  Apparently runners’ math isn’t our strong suit, and after running the necessary 5 miles, we still somehow had an entire mile more (rather than just 1/2 a mile) to walk back to our cars…thankful for the virtual company from: Selena in California, Rita in Canada, Meagan in Australia, Jen in New Hampshire, Lisa in New York, and Carrie in Texas, who helped carry us up that hill.

Melissa and I spent some time again eating watermelon by our cars and stretching (as we had vigilantly after each run), and I remarked that I was so surprised at how well I was holding up.  I had really expected the wheels to be falling off my bus by now; having been plagued by my fair share of running career injuries.  I told Melissa I was convinced that in addition to the few hour breaks between our runs, it was my brother who was clearly carrying me through pain free.  At this point 20 miles into the day, rather than looking forward to the end, I was actually looking forward to running more!

Run 5: without a doubt, my favorite run of the day!  We chose to run by the Croton waterfront, and found ourselves running right alongside the setting sun.  My descriptions will not do it justice, hope you enjoy the photo, and if you’re local GO see one for yourself!

Throughout the day, Melissa peppered questions about Greg into our running conversations, allowing me to reminisce, and her to get to “know” him. I told her about the night he died, and how there was this epic thunder and lightning show that night…but it never. I told her how, 18 years ago we all joked through streaming tears and broken hearts, that the show was Greg’s arrival into Heaven. I told her about this, and then, we turned a corner on the path, and I watched as the sky lit up, and the second best lightning show I have ever seen in my life unfolded.

Greg.

When I ran 26.2 miles for the first time in 2017, I vividly remember getting to mile 21, and thinking there is NO way in hell I can run another step, I was deep, deep in the pain cave, I was banging on the “wall.  I remember looking up to the sky and begging Greg for help, and then when the very next song I heard booming from the street corner was Avicii’s “Hey Brother” …the pain melted.

When I ran the “ultra” this week, I assumed I would have to do the same thing…I assumed I’d be calling out from deep in the pain cave to get through, except that I didn’t.  In fact, I didn’t have to call out to Greg once during my 30 miles because, from the moment I started until the second I finished, I felt my brother with me in a way I never have before.  He gifted me a 24 hour pain free, hot as hell thrill ride…I think, I got a taste of what it was like to live life his way. Silly me to make assumptions about Greg…even now!

The last run of the night was meant to be at 12:30am, but Meissa and I pushed it up to midnight so we could get to sleep sooner.  We had loops of the Croton-Harmon train station parking lot on deck: one big fat loop was equivalent to 1 mile, so 5 loops until the “Finish Line.”  I put my 20 Miles of Smiles playlist on speaker, and side by side we ran.  The first two miles (miles 26 and 27 on the legs) went by rather quickly, the next two were more laborious; I was absolutely thrilled when my watch finally beeped to signal the last mile, and even more thrilled that my legs responded when I told them to GO!  I assumed I’d be crawling through that last mile, and yet I seemed to be flying ~ my 30th mile was my fastest of the day.

Running an “ultra” taught me not to make assumptions about things I think will be hard, but rather to keep my eyes open for the gifts hiding within. Thank you, Greg…

And, thank you to my yeti-buddy, and dear friend Melissa, without whom I could never have done this challenge! I am so proud of you!

And, to my husband Andy, and our boys Grayden and Brody, who I love madly!